I never thought I would be one to consider a home birth. A natural birth yes, but not at home without the assistance of doctors, nurses and access to emergency services. That was until I had the amazingly eye opening experience to be a birth photographer for a dear friend’s home birth. Watching her labor and seeing how calm, supportive and safe the atmosphere was is an experience that stuck with me and left me with the greatest feeling of purpose. My first baby was a cesarean delivery due to breech presentation, but I had always hoped to have a VBAC with my next baby. Shortly after I became pregnant with my second I fired my OBGYN when she told me that a repeat cesarean would be the best option due to my first baby’s size. My desire for a VBAC were met with a dismissive, “We’ll see how it goes.” I left that appointment feeling devastated and like there was something wrong with my body for not being able to do what millions of women had done before me. Rather than sit in my pity I dove head first into research. I met Katarra and everything clicked. I left her office feeling empowered in my choices and in my body.
The morning my labor started on September 28th 2020 I was 39 weeks and 4 days pregnant and wasn’t quite sure it was the real deal. It was 4am and I woke to feeling a cramping and tightening feeling that was much different from the Braxton Hicks that I had been dealing with frequently my entire pregnancy. I quietly timed them as my husband slept next to me. I did not want to wake him until I knew for sure. Four minutes apart and at a fairly steady rhythm. I sat timing my contractions for two hours before my husband’s alarm went off and when I told him what was happening we joked about it being a false alarm. By this point I was fairly certain this was it. We went about our morning as normal, but with an air of electricity in the air.
Ryan went to drop our oldest daughter off at our pre arranged friend’s house and stopped by the grocery store to grab a few things I thought we might need. He stayed on the phone with me and was present through my contractions that were still about 3-4 minutes apart, but were becoming harder to talk through. Between contractions I washed our sheets and made the bed, set up the birth pool and set out everything Katarra had told me we would need. I felt a calmness is this preparation. I remember getting into the shower and letting the water pour over my huge belly and as my husband snapped a quick photo of me it finally sunk in that I was going to meet our daughter today.
Active labor started around 11:30am and wow there was no denying it. Up until this point Ryan had been keeping our doula and Katarra informed about what was going on, but I was enjoying laboring alone with my husband. Now I asked him to call our Doula Karen. She showed up in what was probably ten minutes, but it felt much longer. When she walked through the door I was vocalizing through a contraction and she knew immediately that this was indeed active labor. I asked if she wold check me and she reported that my cervix was still very posterior, but felt very soft. After that I had the green light to get into the birth pool. It felt incredible! I ended up staying here for the majority of my labor from this point. About an hour later Karen called Katarra to let her know it was probably a good idea to head over.
I couldn’t tell you what time it was when I hit transition, but it was somewhere around the time when the waves of my contractions started building on top of one another. They were the most intense sensation I have ever felt. The pain is something that I was able to handle when I knew there would be a break in between, but this was incredibly difficult to cope with. Relentless is the best word I can find to describe what I felt. There was zero break for several contractions. I had been checked several times at this point and had not been progressing. Stuck at four centimeters and still very posterior. Baby sounded and felt good, but this mama was getting tired.
Katarra knew I needed to change positions. The way I was experiencing contractions put me at an increased risk of uterine rupture. Katarra asked me if I would like her to break my water and out of desperation to get things moving I agreed. Labor ramped up even further and while I was barely hanging on I was hopeful that this was what I needed.
They say when you hit transition you are less than an hour away from meeting your baby. That mantra is something I clung to in my head until we were several hours in with no end in sight. My energy was depleting fast and I still had not progressed. Katarra was quick to recognize where I was at and had an IV started. That helped tremendously with my energy, but my spirit was pretty shaken at this point. I asked for a transfer in spite of knowing full well that if I did I would likely be pushed towards another cesarean. My husband calmly talked me off of that ledge while Katarra called on my chiropractor. One house call and a gentle adjustment later and my body was finally getting on board with this whole birth thing. The daggers that must have shot from my eyes when Katarra suggested we do some spinning babies off the side of my couch, but I trusted her. I remember putting up a pretty pitiful protest out of exhaustion, but I was still determined enough to try.
A few minutes later I couldn’t take the urge to push any longer. In the middle of the spinning babies routine I got on to my hands and knees and started pushing with the waves of my body. Wave after wave crashed over me, but it was so nice to be able to actively push with the pain. My daughters head started to crown and Katarra reminded me to reach down and feel her head. SO. MUCH. HAIR. What an incredible feeling that was immediately interrupted by the dreaded ring of fire. During my pregnancy I wanted so badly to experience FER and the effortless birth that I had heard of so many women having in my natural birth groups, but when it came down to it I found way more comfort in pushing with my body. I wanted this baby OUT. My husband braced the upper half of my body as Katarra caught our baby and immediate handed her forward into mine and Ryan’s hands. That moment.
That moment is one where time truly stood still. As I held my tiny daughter I felt a rush of emotions flood over me. Pure intense love for the new soul before me, exhilaration that I was able to have my natural home birth and utter exhaustion hovering under the guise of adrenaline. It was 9:04pm at this point which clocked my labor at roughly 18 hours.
We sat tangled up together nursing and snuggling for an hour. Katarra checked me over and noticed that I was having a pretty moderate hemorrhage. Never once did anything feel chaotic or out of control. She and her assistant administered Pitocin into my thigh and a cocktail of herbs like Shepard’s purse. They got the bleeding under control and after delivering my placenta Ryan cut the cord and held our daughter while Katarra tended to the three small tears I had. My team helped me to the bathroom and into bed. Here is where the newborn exam was preformed. My husband got to weigh her (8lbs 11oz of perfect baby) and our baby never left our sight. After staying for a few hours to make sure we were ok and that I had eaten my amazing birth team left us be in the quiet still of the night to stare in awe at our tiny girl. No nurses walking in every hour to take vitals. Just the most beautifully quiet love bubble that I wished we could have stayed in forever. My home birth experience was intense, but it was the redemption birth I had always wanted and I am so glad I fought for it. We will one hundred percent be going the home birth route with Katarra again with our next baby.
The morning my labor started on September 28th 2020 I was 39 weeks and 4 days pregnant and wasn’t quite sure it was the real deal. It was 4am and I woke to feeling a cramping and tightening feeling that was much different from the Braxton Hicks that I had been dealing with frequently my entire pregnancy. I quietly timed them as my husband slept next to me. I did not want to wake him until I knew for sure. Four minutes apart and at a fairly steady rhythm. I sat timing my contractions for two hours before my husband’s alarm went off and when I told him what was happening we joked about it being a false alarm. By this point I was fairly certain this was it. We went about our morning as normal, but with an air of electricity in the air.
Ryan went to drop our oldest daughter off at our pre arranged friend’s house and stopped by the grocery store to grab a few things I thought we might need. He stayed on the phone with me and was present through my contractions that were still about 3-4 minutes apart, but were becoming harder to talk through. Between contractions I washed our sheets and made the bed, set up the birth pool and set out everything Katarra had told me we would need. I felt a calmness is this preparation. I remember getting into the shower and letting the water pour over my huge belly and as my husband snapped a quick photo of me it finally sunk in that I was going to meet our daughter today.
Active labor started around 11:30am and wow there was no denying it. Up until this point Ryan had been keeping our doula and Katarra informed about what was going on, but I was enjoying laboring alone with my husband. Now I asked him to call our Doula Karen. She showed up in what was probably ten minutes, but it felt much longer. When she walked through the door I was vocalizing through a contraction and she knew immediately that this was indeed active labor. I asked if she wold check me and she reported that my cervix was still very posterior, but felt very soft. After that I had the green light to get into the birth pool. It felt incredible! I ended up staying here for the majority of my labor from this point. About an hour later Karen called Katarra to let her know it was probably a good idea to head over.
I couldn’t tell you what time it was when I hit transition, but it was somewhere around the time when the waves of my contractions started building on top of one another. They were the most intense sensation I have ever felt. The pain is something that I was able to handle when I knew there would be a break in between, but this was incredibly difficult to cope with. Relentless is the best word I can find to describe what I felt. There was zero break for several contractions. I had been checked several times at this point and had not been progressing. Stuck at four centimeters and still very posterior. Baby sounded and felt good, but this mama was getting tired.
Katarra knew I needed to change positions. The way I was experiencing contractions put me at an increased risk of uterine rupture. Katarra asked me if I would like her to break my water and out of desperation to get things moving I agreed. Labor ramped up even further and while I was barely hanging on I was hopeful that this was what I needed.
They say when you hit transition you are less than an hour away from meeting your baby. That mantra is something I clung to in my head until we were several hours in with no end in sight. My energy was depleting fast and I still had not progressed. Katarra was quick to recognize where I was at and had an IV started. That helped tremendously with my energy, but my spirit was pretty shaken at this point. I asked for a transfer in spite of knowing full well that if I did I would likely be pushed towards another cesarean. My husband calmly talked me off of that ledge while Katarra called on my chiropractor. One house call and a gentle adjustment later and my body was finally getting on board with this whole birth thing. The daggers that must have shot from my eyes when Katarra suggested we do some spinning babies off the side of my couch, but I trusted her. I remember putting up a pretty pitiful protest out of exhaustion, but I was still determined enough to try.
A few minutes later I couldn’t take the urge to push any longer. In the middle of the spinning babies routine I got on to my hands and knees and started pushing with the waves of my body. Wave after wave crashed over me, but it was so nice to be able to actively push with the pain. My daughters head started to crown and Katarra reminded me to reach down and feel her head. SO. MUCH. HAIR. What an incredible feeling that was immediately interrupted by the dreaded ring of fire. During my pregnancy I wanted so badly to experience FER and the effortless birth that I had heard of so many women having in my natural birth groups, but when it came down to it I found way more comfort in pushing with my body. I wanted this baby OUT. My husband braced the upper half of my body as Katarra caught our baby and immediate handed her forward into mine and Ryan’s hands. That moment.
That moment is one where time truly stood still. As I held my tiny daughter I felt a rush of emotions flood over me. Pure intense love for the new soul before me, exhilaration that I was able to have my natural home birth and utter exhaustion hovering under the guise of adrenaline. It was 9:04pm at this point which clocked my labor at roughly 18 hours.
We sat tangled up together nursing and snuggling for an hour. Katarra checked me over and noticed that I was having a pretty moderate hemorrhage. Never once did anything feel chaotic or out of control. She and her assistant administered Pitocin into my thigh and a cocktail of herbs like Shepard’s purse. They got the bleeding under control and after delivering my placenta Ryan cut the cord and held our daughter while Katarra tended to the three small tears I had. My team helped me to the bathroom and into bed. Here is where the newborn exam was preformed. My husband got to weigh her (8lbs 11oz of perfect baby) and our baby never left our sight. After staying for a few hours to make sure we were ok and that I had eaten my amazing birth team left us be in the quiet still of the night to stare in awe at our tiny girl. No nurses walking in every hour to take vitals. Just the most beautifully quiet love bubble that I wished we could have stayed in forever. My home birth experience was intense, but it was the redemption birth I had always wanted and I am so glad I fought for it. We will one hundred percent be going the home birth route with Katarra again with our next baby.